Three men who were lost in the forest were captured by
cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could
live if they pass a trial. The first step of the trial was to go
to the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of fruit. So
all three men went separate ways to gather fruits.

The first one came back and said to the king, "I brought ten
apples." The king then explained the trial to him. "You have to
shove the fruits up your butt without any expression on your
face or you'll be eaten."

The first apple went in... but on the second one he winced out
in pain, so he was killed.

The second one arrived and showed the king ten berries. When the
king explained the trial to him he thought to himself that this
should be easy. 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8... and on the
ninth berry he burst out in laughter and was killed.

The first guy and the second guy met in heaven. The first one
asked, "Why did you laugh, you almost got away with it?" The
second one replied, "I couldn't help it, I saw the third guy
coming with pineapples."





A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night and have
dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the
girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would
like to go out and make love for the first time.

Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so
he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. The
pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy
everything there is to know about condoms and sex.

At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms
he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. The boy
insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather
busy, it being his first time and all.

That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parents house and
meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to
meet my parents, come on in!"

The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the
girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace
and bows his head.

A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his
head down.

10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy.

Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend
leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you
were this religious."

The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was
a pharmacist."

Massively multiplayer online role-playing game
Mafia kingz is Gangsta/mafia game and is quite a lot of fun.
Click the link below to start playing.

Mafia Kingz site

.:: 2008 Wildfoods Festival ::.
My partner Tracey and I
traveled over to the wild food festival in Hokitika.
Spent a few hours there had a feed of different foods that you dont eat every day, Veinisen and whitebait, and washed down with some beer. Typical west coast weather it was raining, so we/I decided to take Tracey up to the blow holes in Punakaiki as she has never being there.


Here are some pics.



Famous pancake rocks!


What can you see in this pic?


.:: Click to see all pics! ::.

Long time since I've updated or even being here.

I will be moving house soon, that will give me a good internet connection with telstra clear so I will be reinstalling my game servers.
I hope to have it up at the start of April.

Auto X Christchurch February 22nd and 23rd.

Me and my lady


Some of the cars.







Bikes choppers




Burnouts





Drift cars